On Writing

I often end up in this pose when I am trying to think of what to write.

It is official...I signed up for the NaNoWriMo once again, and I'm probably not going to make it this year either.  I did this last year, but didn't get very far because I was incredibly busy as well as dealing with a lot of emotional turmoil.  I like the idea of NaNoWriMO, but can't seem to stay motivated throughout the whole month.  I may just go back to using 750words.com as a way to become more disciplined about writing, and just leave it at that.  At the same time, in preparation of attempting the NaNoWriMo again this year, I made a list of ideas for novels, some more developed than others, and part of me is itching to actually see if I can develop them into actual novels.  I don't know if I have a successful writer lurking back in psyche somewhere or not, but I do know that I want to develop these stories and not taking the time to write means that they will remain locked inside my brain.

So, with that in mind, I have been thinking about those books and series that I tend to go back and read--what characteristics cause me to want to re-read a book or a series?  I know that the characters tend to speak to me for one reason or another--they are either people that I would want to know or people that I love to hate or pity (Willoughby from Sense and Sensibility or Jean Valjean from Les Miserables, anyone?). They are also nuanced and not 2 dimensional.  The plot is arresting and not one that you can see through.  If it has a Christian theme or character, they don't preach at you, and they have flaws and struggles like anyone else.  Sex, if mentioned, is not explicit.  Characters are not static--their experiences change them in plausible ways. If it is a series, I fall in love with the universe that the story is set in and there is a coherence to the setting, making it fun to return over and over again, just like a favorite vacation spot.

The above is a really tall order, though, and I'm still learning about how to do that.  I seriously doubt that my first attempt at a novel will be very good!  Of course, I have to finish writing it first, don't I?

Cheerleading for Fun and Profit (or Why We Need to be Encouragers)

[As an aside, I think I like blogging so much because of the fun of choosing titles....But that is another post for another day. ;-D]

Most of the time, when  I think of cheerleaders, I think of something like this:

You know the type, the way too perky, always happy person that lives in some kind of la-la land most of the time.  And yet, I am finding myself in the role of cheerleader more and more in my life....If anything, I've always thought of myself as the antithesis of the typical cheerleader.  I'm more of a brooding pessimist than a perpetual optimist with a perky, sparking personality...I am more like this:

I've never been a true goth, but I definitely have a corner on introverted navel-gazing

So, I'm finding myself surprised at how well I can fall into the role of cheer-leading.  How did this happen?  I really don't know, but I am currently my department's Wellness Ambassador, so I've been using that role to convince my colleagues to become more active, and in the process, I am doing a Couch to 5k training program with them on Tuesdays and Thursdays in addition to my normal exercising.  (As an added bonus, I am cultivating more running partners!) With some of the less athletic members of my department, that means reminding them that they can do it...hence the cheer-leading! 

Back when I used to teach public speaking, we spent considerable time talking about public speaking anxiety.  When it came to this particular class, I would usually start by asking students what they were most afraid of about getting up in front of everyone: the answers ranged from passing out or throwing up to having everyone's eyes on them.  A few mentioned that they felt sure that they would die of embarrassment! And yet, in my time teaching public speaking (6+ years), I have never had anyone die, pass out, or throw up.  I have had a student break out in tears, and another one trip and skin her knee on the way to the podium (and a few other jokers taking prat falls for the laugh), but the worst things people thought would happen have never materialized.  The best part of teaching public speaking was seeing how students were able to get past their anxiety to do well!

I'm convinced that we all need encouragers in our lives to keep us from psyching ourselves out of the opportunities God has put in our paths.  Without encouragers and people who can help us look at our own insecurities with a little bit of objectivity, we lose sight of the unique gifts and talents God has given us to share.  Then, we become like that guy in the Parable of the Talents--the one who buries his talent and doesn't do anything with it.  Scripture says that the master throws this servant out for not at least giving the money to money lenders in order to create interest...I don't want to be that kind of person.  I want to use my gifts and talents so that I can leave this world a better place, and that requires both taking risks and receiving encouragement.

While I'm not sure that I will ever be the perky cheer-leading type, I do want to be an encourager in my daily life, and I think that is something that all of us can strive for, since all of us need to be encouraged at times. Most of us have insecurities, and because of them, we tend to overlook some of our own abilities.  When that happens, we tend to avoid putting ourselves out there because we don't want to deal with rejection or failure.  Here's the thing, though.  If we don't try, we can be 100% sure that we won't succeed. So, sometimes, we need a friend or a colleague to come along side us and encourage us to get out there, to try, to let us know that we can try and will (usually) succeed.  I think that is why I love Dr. Seuss's book, "Oh the Places You'll Go." so much.  It doesn't sugar-coat the fact that we will sometimes have to move through failure to find success, but it also encourages us to take that risk.

The last page of the book.  I love Dr. Seuss!

What risk have you been hesitating about?  What has been holding you back?  Go ahead!  You can take that first step!!!

Is it possible to be a biblioholic??? (Or, Bibliophilia on a Budget)

I just checked, and I currently have 165 books in my wish list on Amazon, and that doesn't even count all of the books that I have in my wish list for Audible (41 in my wish list, plus 37 that I have bought and either never finished or never started), the physical books that I own or have borrowed with the intent to read them (25 by my current count), or the books that I will be reading this coming year for book-club... Unfortunately, I think that I end up adding 2-3 books to my list of books to read for every book that I end up buying and/or reading from my wish list.  That doesn't even include the number of books in my Amazon account that I have already bought (and likely have never read), or the number of ebooks that I have through Barnes and Noble. To be fair, most of the books I have with B&N are books that I have actually read, so I will discount them for the current discussion....

Thankfully, most of my unread books are electronic, or my bedroom would probably look something like this!

I'm afraid that I need to find a support group.  "Hi, My name is Ruth and I am addicted to free books..."  ("Hi, Ruth!") It all started when I found Bookbub...and then, I subscribed to their list.  When you subscribe, you basically say what kind of genres you like, and then you get a list of about 5-7 books that are all under about $3-4.  On my list, I always have a few of them that are free, and if the description is even semi-interesting, I just go ahead and download it.  Then, I found out that I could like them on Facebook, and get the book bargains in my news feed....in the process, I started getting a post daily about a book that was free.  This book is usually in my email, so in and of itself, it isn't that interesting.  However, one day, I decided to click on the link, and in the process, I found out that there are more free books than I get in my daily e-mail.  I started clicking the link daily, and then, much to my own amazement, I now have 415 books that I have downloaded, and I have maybe read 20-30 of them, all because of BookBub.

I read. A Lot.  In fact, I probably read 1-2 books a week with gusts up to 4 or 5 books per week, but when I am downloading 5-7 books A DAY, then there is clearly something wrong with this picture (I also probably listen to 1-2 audio books a month).  If I were to quit BookBub cold turkey, refrain from adding any other books to my wish lists, and keep up with a listening/reading quota of 2 books a week plus one audio book per month for the duration, it would take me about 5.5 years to read through the backlog, and 6.5 years to get through the backlog for audio books.  I clearly have a problem, and finding someone who will pay me to read books all day every day is unlikely (however, if you know of a job like that, I would love to hear about it!!!).

I must admit that I have been justifying my BookBub habit...I keep telling myself that I will be able to catch up while I am on my Camino--I will have my iPad Mini with me, so I might as well put it to good use in the evenings by reading, right? I just tallied it up, people, and I have a total of about 575 unread books either in my possession or on my wish list, 385 of which I own in ebook format.  I will be on the Camino for 21 days, so I would have to read 18.3 books a day just to get through all of my ebooks....*shakes her head and laughs*  Even if I were a speed reader, and I'm not, this is not possible! 

Actually, I really just need to weed out the "that sounded interesting at the time" books, the "it doesn't sound boring and it is free" books, and the "I really should read that because so-and-so told me it was good" books from the "I really need to read this for my job" books, the "This is our book-club book for the month," and the "I have been waiting for the last six months for the author to publish again" books.   I also need to be more willing to quit reading a book if it isn't interesting or well written--even though the author isn't sitting there looking over my shoulder,  I often feel like I am insulting them if I don't finish their books.  I can actually count on one hand the number of books that I have purposely never finished and still have fingers left over:  Portrait of the Artist as a Young man; Heart of Darkness; and Pet Cemetery.  The first two were assigned to me in High School, and I just couldn't get to the place where they were interesting...when we quit studying them, I quit reading, even though I wasn't done.  That last book scared me so much that I had nightmares after reading the first chapter! I decided that I didn't need to finish the book, and have actually never read another Steven King novel because of my experiences with that one book.  I have a few other books that I have started with the intention of finishing, but haven't gotten around to completing yet....However, they are non-fiction books, so they are not always meant to be read in one sitting: I don't count them in the above list because of their very nature as non-fiction books.

So, I have made the first step--I have an unread book problem.  How does one learn moderation in acquiring books?  And, how do you determine what you should read?    I would be interested to hear your process for choosing books, both fiction and non-fiction.  And, if I get lost among the pixels, someone may have to complete an intervention on me.  "I'm Ruth, and I am addicted to free books."

This is day 5 of 7.  Go check out all of the other people that picked up the gauntlet that Jennifer Fulweiler threw down!

I am looking for a passage...

When I was in college, one of the greatest spiritual exercises I ever did was to take a passage of scripture and memorize the whole passage.  I did so by taking one verse for each day and meditating on it all day long until I could recite it at the end of the day.  The passage I chose for that exercise was Philippians 2: 1-12, and to this day, it is a passage that resonates in my heart.  I think that some of it has to do with the fact that I rolled it around, savored all the accents, and then did so again in case I missed anything, much like one would do with tasting a fine wine for the first time. 

I am told that Northern Spain has some very good wines, so I'm going to do my best to try a few of them!

As I am a little more than five weeks away from my Camino (36 days!!!), I have a lot to do for work, but I find myself thinking more and more about what I'm going to be doing as I walk day in and day out.  I'm sure that I will be talking to fellow pilgrims, as well as spending time in prayer by myself each day, but it seems to me that it is a unique time to tackle another passage and commit it to memory, especially since I will have a good 8-9 hours each day when I am walking.  At first, I thought that I would use Psalm 119, since memorizing the whole of it is on my bucket list, but I'm not sure that I can really meditate on more than one verse at a time--If I chose this passage, it would mean that I would have to memorize 7-8 verses per day in order to finish by the time I got to Santiago (I will only be on the Camino for 21 total days--19 days walking plus 2 rest days).    Then, I thought of my favorite Psalm, Psalm 27, but it is only 14 verses long, and I would run out of verses before I got to Santiago.  I can't think of any other passages off the top of my head...

This is from Burgos, the town that I will begin walking from

So, I would like to ask you, my readers, to maybe suggest a passage of scripture that would be appropriate to work on memorizing while I am on my Camino.  The passage should be between 19 and 22 verses long, although closer to 19 would be better, and it would be nice if it loosely related to pilgrimage (Psalm 27 is a pilgrim's hymn, and was usually sung on the trip to Jerusalem).  However, any passage of note would do.  I will be looking myself, and will post here what passage of Scripture I eventually choose in case you would like to memorize it with me. Just as I have asked specific people in my life to give me pebbles to leave at Cruz de Ferro, I want to include you in the pilgrimage, at least virtually....This is another way to include you and let you participate.  :-)

I look forward to hearing your suggestions!

This is day 3 of the 7 day Challenge that Jennifer Fulweiler set up...Check out this link to see who else picked up the gauntlet!

Book Club for the next year!!!

I love going to book club...It forces me to read books that I might not have picked up otherwise, as well as gives me one night a month to spend with friends.  Accepting the invitation of my sister to join book club when I first moved to EP was one of the best decisions I have ever made.  Even though I'm not a mom and not homeschooling (this book club was started as an adjunct to the local Catholic Home-school Group), they have embraced me and I value all of their friendships immensely.

Thankfully, the ladies aren't like this...I think it comes from the fact that all of them are busy moms--read the book or don't, but still come for the fellowship!

 So, after all of us voted on close to 50 books, our choices for the next year have been chosen.  The winners are:

• August: The School if the Family by Chantal Howard
• September: The Innocence of Father Brown by GK Chesterton
• October: Nine Years Under: Coming of Age in an Inner City Funeral Home by Sheri Booker
• November: Miracles of Father Kapuan: Priest, Soldier, Korean War Hero by Ray Wenzl
• we were told last night that this book was voted for by all but one of us.
• December: No Meeting
• January: Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen
• February: The Ear of the Heart by Mother Delores Hart
• March:  Fire Within: St. Teresa of Avila, St. John of the Cross, and the Gospel on Prayer by Thomas Dubay
• April: Call the Midwife by Jennifer Worth
• May:  Imitating Mary, Ten Marian Virtues for the Modern Mom by Marge Fenelon
• June: The Diving Bell and the Butterfly by Jean-Dominique Bauby
• July: The One Thing is Three by Michael Gaitley

It is kind of interesting, because we usually have more fiction on the list, but it looks like there are only 3 fiction titles on the list this year...we also have more memoirs this year.  I think that many of us need to quit reading Jennifer Fulweiler's blog, since many of the memoirs are books she recommended!!!  It is also nice to see that Austen made the list this year--we seem to read one of her novels every other year or so.  We didn't read her this past year, but we read Bronte's Jane Eyre, as well as another Ann Patchett Novel.  We seem to read Patchett every other year, too.  Two years ago, we read Patron Saint of Liars by her and all of us agreed that we didn't like the ending.  It is one of the things that is most frustrating about Patchett--it is like she never really finishes her books!


I'm kind of sad because I'm going to miss book club in September, since I will be on my Camino, especially since the Fr. Brown novel is one of the books that I recommended to the club.  At least I already have it downloaded to my iPad Mini (free e-book!!!), so I will likely read it while in Spain, if not before.

Me reading with my critters.  I have been using e-books almost exclusively for the last 4-5 years!

I will be leading the discussion in October and April this year.  I'm looking forward to it!